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News Briefs 31-03-2016

“I’m late! I’m late! For a very important date! No time to say hello, goodbye! I’m late! I’m late! I’m late!”

Thanks to Greg, Michael Mayes, Chris Knowles, and viewers like you.

“My idea is that the term ‘supernatural’ is a gross mistake. We have only to enlarge our conceptions of the natural, and all will be alright.”
– Alfred Russel Wallace

  1. milk bottles and other news
    Milk bottles: I like the design but at the same time feel bad for the farmers that lost their cows. Also aliens have done this to other livestock, including horses.

    Kenya: What the actual fuck is this article.

    Panther,: Yes there are panthers in Florida. That’s nothing new nor weird, though it’s a nice photo of one. Still trying to convince people where I live that there are coyotes walking around.

    Not a spider: Again not unusual when you consider there are nonvenomous snakes pretending to be vipers. Nature is all about imitation to survive.

    1. from the Whizzing-Past-the-Future-Dept.
      [quote=LastLoup]

      Kenya: What the actual fuck is this article.[/quote]

      Cherish that experience — you’re experiencing from outside a Belief System/Culture :3

      (or it could just be bad writing)

  2. alien vegans and cows
    I’m sorry but the word “expert” should be used loosely in the article about Eisenhower’s great granddaughter. She sounds like someone trying to get everyone on a health kick. The only reason I could ever imagine aliens want us to turn vegan is so we would be easier to conquer. After having friends who were vegan and went back to vegetarian or eating meat (albeit in moderation) I can say with confidence that out only weakens the body. Humans are designed to eat meat. Plus I don’t want to take 18 different pills each day just so my bones don’t fall apart from a lack of calcium. And then there’s this:

    [quote=]Well, the Greys absorb energy through their body like a plant, so they don’t. They lost their reproductive capacities. Then there are EBEs (extraterrestrial biological entities). Then there are Reptilians who supposedly eat humans, but I don’t want to scare anybody. We are all multidimensional beings, so we are dealing with a huge food chain. I’m not an expert in their diet but it is something that people still need to do some research on.[/quote]

    ABSORBING ENERGY LIKE A PLANT IS A FORM OF EATING!!!! Also Greys aren’t the only alien species out there. Somewhere I imagine in vastness of the universe there is an animal like a dog. To think otherwise is illogical. She just said she’s not an expert, please change the title of the article Munchies.

    Jeebus what the actual fuck is this article. I can’t decide if Munchies takes her seriously and is using her for vegan propaganda or they just felt like fucking with everyone. I read the word Ascended Masters in there somewhere and walked away.

  3. from the No-Bird-Left-Behind-Dept.
    Chris Savia,

    you made me remember my time as an assistant geologist atop a mountaintop for a summer when we’d have to defend ourselves against Ptarmigan who were extremely cute, perfectly camouflaged against the lichen & dirt & who would launch themselves like a living land mine that would then fly directly into your face

    We learned to use our shovels as a defense–PTARMIGAN ATTACK!! SHOVEL BLOCK!! Stunned ptarmigan, walk carefully away

    We were also very careful not to step on any preborn Ptarmigan — again, perfectly camouflaged in the lichen n dirt

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