News Briefs 26-02-2007

Things that make you go “hrmmm”…

• Female koalas indulge in lesbian sex orgies. You don’t want to know what wombats get up to.
• Is this the hand of a yowie, or did a male koala get a little too close to the action?
• Are these trees on Mars the kind of eucalypt fussy koalas like to eat? It was the film Ed Wood never made, Lesbian Koalas from Mars.
• The Pioneer 10 and 11 spacecraft, launched in 1972 and 1973, aren’t where they’re supposed to be.
• The planetary surface habitat and airlock unit has been delivered to NASA Langley for studies into permanent bases on the moon.
• The director of Dan Aykroyd’s UFO documentary says that a UFO changed his life.
• The Book of THoTH has an article by Nick Pope about the Cosford incident, multiple UFOs witnessed by hundreds of people.
• Newly released internal Ministry of Defence documents give a fascinating insight into the UK military’s interest in UFOs. I love this quote, “We did encourage our scientists not to think that we in the west knew everything there was to be known.”
• Witnesses say a UFO they saw over Tuscon was one mile long.
• Is this photo of a UFO at Los Confines Airport, Chile, genuine or a fake?
• What are the strange light orbs appearing at a church?
• A new documentary to air on the Discovery Channel claims a 2000-year-old tomb may have housed the remains of Jesus of Nazareth and his family, including his son named Judah. Japan, England, India, the moon … where else has Jesus been buried?
• There’s a growing belief among some Christian groups that alien abductions are misinterpreted, and are really attacks perpetrated by demons. The thought of The Excorcist combined with Communion scares the hell out of me.
• Men in Tanzania are apparently living in fear of being sexually assaulted by bat-like demons. I guess they’ve never seen a koala before.
• Because seeing a chimpanzee spear and eat a bush baby in Greg’s news disturbed me, here’s an article without video. You sure we want those chimps typing up the news briefs, Greg?
• If you prefer to eat bush babies with a spoon, then try this twelve-step guide to spoon-bending.
• Have extraterrestrials built secret underwater bases, and what are the USOs emerging from the oceans?
• Can science explain why people have reported seeing the Loch Ness monster as far back as the 7th Century?
• Strange new sea creatures have been found in the Antarctic, including a psychedelic octopus. Now I understand the lyrics to the Beatles song: I’d like to be, under the sea, in an Octopus’s garden, in the shade.
• A 5000-year-old golden artificial eyeball once occupied the eye socket of an ancient Persian soothsayer or priestess. She looked like Aughra (who apparently looks like Condoleeza Rice).
• A tourist invasion threatens to destroy Angkor Wat. Looters aren’t helping either.
• A group of more than 90 international companies have called for immediate action by the world’s governments to stop man-made climate change.
• If you thought climate change, war and disease were hard to deal with, an asteroid is headed our way in 2036. Let’s party like it’s 1999.
• Mobile trailers bought and paid by FEMA for Hurricane Katrina refugees are tainted with formaldehyde and are causing major health issues.

Thanks Kat.

Quote of the Day:

“The national security implications are considerable. We have many reports of strange objects in the skies and we have never investigated them. I also believe that it is important to appreciate that what is scientific ‘fact’ today may not be true tomorrow … If reports are taken at face value then devices exist that do not use conventional reaction propulsion systems, they have a very wide range of speeds and are stealthy. I suggest that we could use this technology, if it exists.”

briefing note by anonymous author, from the secret UFO investigation branch of Defence Intelligence (DI55)