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Lots of potential Christmas presents in today’s news. Ah, I love capitalistic holidays.

  • Lightning bolts on Saturn are a million times stronger than those on Earth. I bet Jim Caviezel is glad Mel Gibson didn’t shoot The Passion Of Christ (Amazon US or UK) on Saturn.
  • Manchester is England’s least church-going city. Is there a football game on Christmas day?
  • Michael Baigent and Richard Leigh, authors of Holy Blood Holy Grail (Amazon US or UK), are suing those responsible for The Da Vinci Code. I just want $12.99 and a day of my life back. If Santa thinks you’ve been bad, expect a copy of Dan Brown’s Angels & Demons (Amazon US or UK) under your Christmas Tree.
  • Is the Indian Government/Military in contact with extraterrestrials? Or do extraterrestrials just like Bollywood movies?
  • A new species of monkey has been discovered in Northeastern India. Officials are puzzled there has been no hysterical mass-panic due to sightings of brain-sucking phantom monkeys. “Sometimes a monkey is just a monkey,” says local banana grower.
  • A UFO was witnessed near Jakarta, Indonesia. Officials say it may have been part of a meteor shower. You may remember I linked to a report of a similar event in China a week or so ago.
  • Thinking of going back to school? Enrol now in Paranormal 101. Subjects offered include clairvoyance, clairaudience, auras, and how to use a spirit guide. Students must provide their own ectoplasm.
  • Mayan folklore says whistling dwarves built the pyramids at Chichen Itza, and the latest scientific findings reveal surprising acoustics for the El Castillo pyramid.
  • Well-preserved Medieval and Roman artifacts unearthed in Hampshire, England.
  • Scientists take first step towards creating artificial life.
  • A compromise has been made over global climates.
  • Commercial applications of microwave frequencies, such as mobile phones, are ruining Meteorologists’ forecasting techniques. Meteorologists must hate going to the cinema then.
  • Marine biologists prove that sharks respond to magnetic fields.
  • Michael Crichton argues Global Warming is a myth in his latest thriller, State of Fear (Amazon US or UK). Yes, it may be, but that doesn’t mean we can continue raping and destroying the Earth.
  • For counter-balance, read The Coming Global Superstorm (Amazon US or UK) by Art Bell and Whitley Strieber. Or watch The Day After Tomorrow for the real facts. Greenpeace never mentioned hungry wolves …
  • US space agency confirms there has been a dramatic thinning of Antarctic ice.
  • How to make (and sell) technology more human and avoid techno-rage.
  • Speaking of rage, there’s talk of lifting the ban on mobile (cell) phones on flights. Using mobile phones, and cigarettes, on flights and in cinemas, pubs and restaurants, should constitute an act of terrorism.
  • Pliable solar cells will revolutionise the way we live. I want a hover-board like Marty McFly’s.
  • Scientists use a nano-needle to operate on a single cell.
  • Do surgeons who play video games make fewer errors? Imagine being wheeled into surgery and seeing the Super Mario Brothers! Adults who play The Sims make better parents/partners. As for Manhunt and Grand Theft Auto …
  • Nigeria has been chosen to host the 2008 Genocides. Seriously, while the Left fight America, and the Right fight The Enemy, Africa slips through the middle, ignored and forgotten, especially what’s happening in Sudan and Africa’s AIDS crisis. Instead of wondering what you’ll get for Christmas, how about thinking about what you will give instead?

Quote of the Day:

There are potentially another 10 Afghanistans in Africa, and it is cheaper by a factor of 100 to prevent the fires from happening than to put them out

Bono, leadsinger of U2